What do think of my story?: Its get review now by some book editor's?

I do not intend any disrespect, but it's very bad, honestly, full of grammatical errors and awkward writing; for instance, you have mes of run-on sentences, and you do not include quotation marks or proper punctuation. Also, it is highly unlikely that it would be cheaper to send someone to France than pay 1700; international plane tickets alone cost quite a bit, not to mention baggage fees. Besides this, why does the main character act as if she did not hear her parents discussing this the night before? You've made it obvious that she overhead her parents speaking, so it should come as no surprise. The writing style is very bland and boring, and overall I would suggest that you start fresh after some considerable looking into of grammar and sentence structure and the rudiments of writing. Read as much as you can as well. Good luck.